The way I see it, there are 2 types of people in the world…
One: Those who stalk the shit out of their object of affection online and two: Those who straight up lie.
Ever since the dawn of the likes of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and every other social media phenomenon that sucks away your self-respect and dignity most days of the week, getting to know a potential suitor has become well urmmm weird. With just a click of a mouse or a tap of your overworked arthritic thumbs on a smartphone screen we are able to lock down a person’s vital stats. I am able to find out what their interests are, where they were last night, what food do they like and which hand they prefer to use whilst brushing their teeth.
Gone are the days when getting to know someone meant real life interaction. Sure why would I ask someone their likes and dislikes when they’ve taken a photograph, hashtagged the word ‘like’, filtered it within an inch of its life and stuck it online?!
I remember back in the day when conversing with strangers online you would ask “ASL” which meant age, sex and location. These were the only parts of information offered to you, and even that was nothing to go on. If you like someone now you can orchestrate a most fabulous ‘accidental’ run in at their favourite café where they go every Friday to buy a lunchtime bagel. You also will have lots to talk about as of course you have already digested their ‘about’ section on Facebook and are equipped with the knowledge that they ‘checked in’ at a Macklmore gig last Tuesday.
I miss getting to know a new person by firing off a million questions to unearth a host of characteristic traits that either had you running for the hills or wanting to French kiss on the first date! Due to a generation of lazy schmucks where nobody is interested in life unless there’s an app for that, and the uprising of new technology, we no longer have the chance to just have chats and Forest Gump new love interests. The adventure of getting to know someone in real time has been stubbed out for favour of over sharing on social media.
The thing is, I would love to shut down all my social media accounts but if you’re not visible online, then you’re apparently dead in real life… and that would be unfortunate. I guess we all create an online persona just in case someone decides to stalk us enough to say hi. We’re edited versions of ourselves online. The finest version where we have the best time of our lives… all day every day. It would be nice to just meet someone who knows nothing about me except my ASL instead of my favourite t-shirt I wore in one of my Facebook albums from 2008.